Cause enough isn't enough this time...

Wow, so much to riff about. Might as well start at the beginning.

So, I returned to my own personal Disneyworld, Las Vegas, 2 weeks ago. My anticipation per usual was super high, because lets face it, its Vegas. I tempered my expectations cause I realized I would have to work during the day, so I couldn't bank on sleeping off the previous night's nonsense as I would normally. Thursday night was largely uneventful except for O'Sheas forcefully violating my neither regions for $250 in their clever legalized form of casino rape. I did, in a gin soaked revelation, discover that the 21 year old idiot who had been splashing chips at my blackjack table looked just like Nick Jonas. So I began berating him, asking how his friendship with Hannah Montana was, asking where his purity ring was. He began to get annoyed when I implored his female companion as to why she was with an underage Disney pop star and didn't she realize that he and his brother's purity pledge meant she would be getting nary a heavy pet later that night. She found it hilarious and recognized the resemblance. Our large African American dealer was singing Party in the USA at him every time he won a hand. It was all fun and games till he angrily informed us he was going to law school at NYU in the fall and could "sue our asses". Right, keep on "Burnin' Up" young Nicholas.

The rest of my weekend consisted of me making some money back, then losing my entire stake I took out there with me. Whoops, Saturday night got ugly. I did run into one of the Real Housewives of New York in the Venetian however. One of the girls I work with evidently is obsessed and in her post dinner drunkeness spies a woman who she decides looks like Kelly from the show. Now I have seen maybe one episode for 10 min, so the hell if I know who she is talking about, but she proceeds to scream "Kelly!" twice. And only in Vegas, the woman turns around and its Ms. BravoTV herself. Much hugging and excitement ensues. She actually was incredibly gracious, friendly and overall talkative. During the 5 min conversation in which I said next to nothing, cause I certainly didn't feel like talking about jewelry or anything of that nature, she did spot me out and compliment my Silly Bands, cause face it, they are pretty sweet. She rocked one herself and suddenly I looked pretty awesome. Color me impressed that a reality TV celeb famous for no real reason was legit cool in real life. Now I still won't watch that show cause I prefer my reality TV to be 7 strangers picked to live in a house and have their lives taped, and then those same strangers when they aren't strangers duking it out in feats of strength challenge style, or Top Chef. Either way, it was a decent Vegas style celebrity interaction.

Speaking of jewelry, the huge show I was at also solidified for me how much I really don't care about the industry I'm in, which was both weird and a bummer. I love my Dad's company and find it extremely interesting and intriguing. However, it is essentially a technology company that happens to work in the diamond industry. The diamond and jewelry industry itself really holds no allure to me and that was never more evident that at the marquee event of the year. There were plenty of pretty things to look at and ridiculous displays of product ego and hubris, but as a whole I found it very meh. I get more excited from looking at articles on Yahoo Finance. That's not to say I will never find myself involved in my Dad's company and thus in the industry, but just not directly immersed in it like I am now. It just further clarified my need and desire to pursue my professional aspirations wholeheartedly. More on that in a minute.

Travelling of course was eventful as usual. Most notably, on the way out to Vegas, I had the consummate pleasure of sitting in front of the 3 "oh my gawd its out first time going to Vegas, its soo awesome" girls who proceeded to be annoying from boarding till we touched down. Highlights included buzzing the stewardess to ask if they could get drinks AS WE WERE TAXIING FOR TAKEOFF, followed shortly by one of the girls breaking into hysterics because she was scared of flying (complete with hyper-ventilating and shrieks), and overall obnoxious behavior as they tried to hit on the disinterested guy trying to sleep across the aisle from them.

Annoying skank: "So you live in Vegas, thats so amazing!"
Guy: (with headphones still on) Yeah, its alright.
AS: So you must go out like every night right?!
G: Not really, I, like, have to still work and stuff, I have a job.
AS: But do you like gamble at the casinos everyday?
G: (visibly exhausted by her questions) No, I keep away from the Strip. You don't go to the Sears Tower everyday do you?
AS: NO! But its different. Its like Vegas! This is so gonna be like Sex and the City...

I wish I was kidding about that last line. But no, she was serious as my headache from listening to her whore babble. I'm not sure what episode she was referring to, but unless there is an episode in which a handsome gentleman sitting in the seat in front of her opens the exit row door and chucks her incessantly inane ass out into the desert below, I'm sure it was not appropriate for the situation. I could go on about the other retarded things they said, including the girl freaking out about every bit of turbulence and plane movement to the extent that I was getting psyched out, but I don't have 4 hours to write it all down...especially because they sat within 2-3 rows of me on my flight back as well. I wish I was kidding. I resisted every urge to sprint through the concourses and out of O'Hare just to evade a single moment more of mind numbing conversation. It makes me scared to think they will probably all be wives and mothers someday.

On a more euphoric note, the Blackhawks are the motherfucking Stanley Cup champions. I resisted posting immediately about how excited I was and just let it all sink in. I have been an overly emotional sports fan for the majority of my life and have had my share of heartbreaks. I mean, I'm a Cubs fan after all. Coming into the Stanley Cup finals, the closest I had ever come to my favorite team in any sport winning a championship was Marquette's Final Four run in 2003 or the Bears Super Bowl loss in '07. Frankly, as much as I love them, I knew the Bears weren't gonna win that game against Peyton Manning and the Colts. The Marquette run was probably one of the most memorable and fun 2 weeks of my life, but it was all overshadowed by the curb stomping they received from that Keebler Elf Kirk Heinrich and his Kansas Jayhawk douche friends in the Final Four down in New Orleans. Of course I was there and felt as if I had been maced while being stiletto'd in the groin. I remember vehemently arguing with my Dad that I didn't give a damn about our flight, I just wanted to drive home to Milwaukee like a petulant child. Luckily cooler heads prevailed and I saw a pretty awesome Championship game in which Kansas then lost in heartbreaking fashion (haha, suck it Kirk!) but needless to say, I was still waiting for that sweet minty taste of championship.

So when everyone's favorite cab patron, Patrick Kane, slipped in that game winner in overtime, my head nearly exploded. I tackled my roommate, screamed nonsensically, and ran down the hall to jump into a closed door like it was the boards at the United Center. I texted around 20 people (half of which, including my father, had no idea what I was talking about or frankly didn't really care), and insisted on Chelsea Dagger being played on repeat. Walking outside, it was pandemonium. A fire truck rolled down Division full horns and sirens blaring. Every cabbie was laying on his horn, probably in tribute to Kane. Let me stop for a second and comment on the irony of cabbies celebrating. Most of these foreign gentlemen probably have little to no idea what hockey actually is, and had no real idea what ice was till recently, but they were LOVING it. That is what its all about.

The chaos continued through the parade on Friday. 2 million people downtown? For rizzeal? I can honestly say that I had goosebumps as the parade trolleys rolled by and maybe some misty tears in my eyes (though that could have been from the stench of alcohol rolling off of the countless high schoolers from the suburbs who invaded downtown. Seriously, its 10 AM, do you need to be wasted to enjoy such badassery?). At that point, I stopped giving a damn about fairweather fans, or who really loved the Hawks and who just wanted to party. There was a buzz and positivity to the entire city that I wanted to bottle up and wear around my neck like an amulet, or maybe fashion into a musky cologne that would stir the loins of any fair dame who happened to like watching a little puck. Either way, it was just special. I can't be more proud of the team, my city, or the cabbies. It was an amazing playoffs and to finally be able to end a sports season without the normal side dishes of longing and disappoint me, that leaves me full and satiated.

As any of you loyal serfs of the King of the South know, T.I. is no longer incarcerated for being a gun-toting badass trying to protect himself from hood rats who are jealous and want to cause him harm. So now he can go back to punching them straight in the face with banging tracks. Normally you would assume an artist would need a bit of time to get their flow fresh and tight again. Not ol' TIP. Yeah You Know is absolutely absurd. I mean, 5 seconds of the beat and I already knew it was going to be a staple of my summer playlists. I cannot express how much I love and respect T.I. as a musician. My first ever blog post praised Paper Trail and I can say that the man continues to impress and pump up. I hope I can bring the same level of swagger and flow to the diamond industry as T.I. brings to the rap game. Those Israelis better watch out.

"Make magic happen with cash I’m actually catchin magic, In the market for lavish mansions and NBA expansions..."

JW