Crack is wack.

Its amazing how when you've had a bad/annoying day, the littlest thing can set you off. For example, coming home today, I was waiting for the Red Line. Now I have been subjected to countless performers in the Jackson station. The 3 young boys with tons of grease in their hair offering R&B renditions to the African-American gentleman playing covers of John Mayer and America, which is hilarious cause both artists are so quintessentially white. However, today, there was a black woman crooning a capella. Now she has been there before and its just meh. Today she was rocking Amazing Grace and then O Come All Ye Faithful (yes, bitch was singing Christmas hymns in the dead of August). However, shortly before the train arrived, she broke out in to Whitney Houston's badass "I Will Always Love You". Now this song is badass solely because of the difficultly and the killer pipes of Ms. Houston. This woman thought she could cover it. Now she has an alright voice with a decent register, but it was nowhere near the only awesome cover I have ever heard of this song. In fact, when she mangled the start of the chorus, I remarked "Oh hell no" loud enough that the girl next to me started laughing and commented that "She doesn't sound like Whitney, does she?" Oh she did...after Whitney had smoked enough crack that you could have used her as a chimney sweep.

I think of myself as a pretty even tempered person. I used to have quite the temper (enough that I wasn't able to play travelling club soccer cause my parents worried my temper would get me in trouble) but Ive grown up and usually internalize it, though its not always a good thing. However, this means I rarely have outbursts. Well at work today, that was not the case. I have the misfortune of sitting next to one of the more obnoxious trainees. Now I understand, a short time ago I was just like him, but I did a lot of listening and staying silent. This ass clown feels the need to jabber constantly. And its not pleasant conversation, its his need to comment on things you are doing or trying to endear himself to you by pretend we're all in it together...we're not. I try to tune him out, but its tough. We refer to him as "Fly" because, well, you can figure it out.

Anyways, I have been having a very rough week. Like, lost double what a good week usually is for me. So I'm stressed because Im disappointed in myself, the market sucks, knowing my heartless employers, I could be canned any day for all I know. So needless to say, Im a bit wired. Well I also have the tendancy to talk to stocks and current positions like they are petulant children. Well the following exchange occured to me and this new little insect-like minion:

(Warning, strong language ahead)

JW: "Come on, go. Get the fuck up. Son of a bitch, you fucking cock goblin."
Fly: Haha, that was really funny dude.
JW *looking straight ahead* "You know what else is funny? You shutting the fuck up"

I then continue to look straight ahead and blow a bubble for good measure.

Fly: "Relax, we're all having a rough time man. Market's crazy huh?"

I then proceed to shoot him an icy glare that states "You know nothing and I just lost more than you'll make in a month, so please shut the fuck up and in a few months, if you're still here, then maybe we can be buddies." Silence...booyah

Does this make me an ass? Perhaps, but I feel like I am do for a snap every once and awhile. Thank god its the weekend.

In other news...Oh man, so much random CTA/transit hilarity lately.

-Woman riding her bike down Wells and puts her hand out to make a turn signal, only to recieve a high five from a passerby sending her careening out of control, almost hitting a car and having to jump off her bike. I swear this is one of the funniest things Ive ever seen. I almost forgot to laugh it was so ridiculous.

-Gospel rapper on the subway singing a song with a chorus that went "We dont neeeeeeed guuuunnns". Think of whatever offbeat weird melody you can think of an it was pretty close.

-My personal favorite. I was on the train home yesterday when a little boy of about 7 was running amuck. I mean yelling, bouncing off people, being generally obnoxious. He tried to smack my phone out of my hands as I was simply trying to get a nice game of solitaire in during my commute. Well as this incorrigble little beast was terrorizing this train like a Poltergeist, his mother was on her phone gabbing like she was auditioning for the Hills. Well, her parenting abilities were clearly substandard. Though she was a dime, if I was looking for a Quiz Bowl partner, I would probably be better off using an actual dime I find in my pocket. Well I enacted my revenge shortly before I left the train. As we were coming to the stop, I bent down and tapped the retarded leprachaun on the shoulder as he was probably tying an old woman's shoelaces together or something. As he looked at me with a blank stare, I told him "Your mom is hot. Go tell her, she will understand cause she is." With that I exited the train and hoped that he would be tormented soon enough with the thought of his mom being some MILF lusted after by men all over Chicago. Unfortunately I then realize he was both 7 and probably with the intelligence of a lampost, so I just hope his mom felt weird.

So Matisyahu has a new single, One Day, out. And it kicks ass per usual. Now I could write 5 blog posts about how much I love this dude and his music. I remember the first time I heard King Without a Crown, I remember being a bit iffy on it. But it was intriguing and so I gave it and the rest of his CD some spins. And I was hooked. Now despite being a religious/spiritual person, I have never been much of a fan of Christian rock or the like, cause it always seems a bit off lyrically. Well Matisyahu is just as direct, but there is just this honesty and sincerity to it. Its hard to describe, but there is just this atmospheric cadence to his delivery, obviously a reflection of the traditional Jewish songs and chants in temple. His music honestly just makes me feel really damn good. Its so cheesy, but its utterly true. So gorgeous, so rhythmically diverse, so unique. I mean, a Hasidic Jew sing-rapping with a reggae influence intermixed with traditional Jewish chants and calls? That works? Really? Does it ever. If you have never listened try Jerusalem (what a fucking jam), Time of Your Song (just perfect), and Indestructible (even my Dad loves this song. And its so overtly religious but yet not overbearing). I dare you to not enjoy. I also saw him in concert last summer, and I still get goosebumps thinking about it. It was like a jam band concert mixed with the uplifting feel of gospel choir mixed with a giant mosh pit. He is such a unique dude you forget he is still some late 20s dude. Its that beard. When mixed with prayer curls, the traditional scarves, and for the show I was at, a cocked Packers hat, dude is a badass enigma. Alright, enough gushing like a fanboy, I'll go back to rocking back and forth and smiling thinking of the massive dance party I participated in onstage.

"Sometimes in my tears I drown, but I never let it get me down. So when negativity surrounds, I know some day it'll all turn around"

JW