So pardon me as I rant for a moment. I stepped outside this morning, the first Monday of Spring, fresh faced and ready for the week, only to be blown back by a cold wind, and retreated back upstairs to grab a jacket.
Now last Friday was March 20th which means two things: 1) my little sisters birthday (Happy 15th to Ms. Cassidy Wagner) and 2) the first day of Spring. Well to me, Spring signifies sunshine, and rebirth, and fresh attitudes, and most importantly, better weather. Well, having grown up my entire life in the "northern" part of the Midwest, I should know that this is patently false. One thing I truly miss about being at school in SW Ohio was the fact that not only did Spring usually arrive in late Feb, but once it warmed up, usually it was warm for good. None of this 60 one day, 20 the next for a month to two month period as I always got in Milwaukee and now in Chicago. Really, Spring lasted 2 months, the end of April, through June 20th. The rest was a 5 month long winter. It got me thinking, Winter is completely worthless. In my maturation, I have come to realize that I hate cold weather, just despise it, so it pretty much renders Winter a waste of time. Lets examine the pros and cons of Winter. And then I will just demolish the Pros and expose Winter for the frigid bitch she is.
These were my Pros growing up:
Skiing
Christmas
Snow/Sledding/Snowmen
College Basketball
Alright, so Skiing. I love skiing, its one of my favorite things, Im awesome at it, yadda yadda. I haven't been skiing in the Midwest since I was a JR in HS. I got to CO usually once a year, so I get my fix there. So I dont need "winter" for that. I could do that living in Hot-lanta. Christmas, well technically, Christmas takes place 5 days after Winter starts. So fine, Winter is awesome for 2 weeks, Christmas through New Years. Snow/Sledding/Snowmen...I now live in a city. Snow is obnoxious, its everywhere and its feet deep and the salt destroys clothes and your floors. Lame. And sledding? Well lets just say there are no hills in Lincoln Park. College Basketball is still amazing, but I could enjoy that just as much in a place where Winter doesnt exist, like Miami Beach, and besides, its capped off by March Madness, which takes place in Spring.
Ok, so for the purposes of my argument, I am directly associating Winter with cold weather and snow. The "winter" they have in the South must be great actually. 50 degrees, little break from the heat, show off a bit different wardrobe. I could get down with that.
Winter is just a giant figurative, and literal, cockblock/cocktease. I mean good things don't happen in winter. Feeling under the weather? Awesome, maybe you will feel better in April, cause you certainly won't get healthy during Winter. Feeling lonesome and unhappily single? Get used to it cause Winter makes every single person's chances as pathetic as those people on TV who weren't accepted to Match.com and are shilling for some other crackerjack site. Relationships are like flowers, they need to grow and bloom. Well nothing grows and blooms in Winter, shit dies as Winter hovers around like the obnoxious friend who wont let you get your swerve on cause they think you have had 1 too many spirits. Come to think about it, Winter is like that bitchy girl in HS you had a huge crush on. She is mean, makes you feel terrible, your friends hate her, you don't find any new love cause you are hung up on her, but yet you still think there is something good about her, maybe it was how good she looked running in a sports bra during Cross Country practice, but you really can't recall. There has to be right? Then you graduate HS and the truth smacks you in the face and you realize how foolish you were. She really did suck.
Well I have graduated, all that propaganda about being able to enjoy all 4 seasons...hogwash. I love fall and spring is sweet too, so I would gladly take and extra month of each with a brief timeout in the middle somewhere.
Phew, I am glad I got that off my chest. I refuse to let Winter facewash me anymore. I am standing up to Mother Nature at the end of next fall, we'll see how that goes. In the meantime, I am just praying Spring arrives semi on schedule. Its supposed to be 65 tomorrow, but as I write this, there is a bad blizzard in Wyoming, so I fear some weather nonsense is coming after me shortly. In the meantime, I am just not going to bring a coat tomorrow...cause I am a BAMF.
Edit: I wore a jacket today, cause even the awesome are not immune to cold winds. 60+ temps my ass...
Ever have one of those moments where you are sitting at your desk and a song you haven't listened to in a long time just pops in your head? Completely unannounced, haven't listened to the band in awhile, etc...Not some annoying Top 40 jam or $5 footlong, but a legit awesome song. Well it happened to me on Friday, with Saosin-Its So Simple. I have always thought Saosin was underrated. Sweet band name, pretty cool musically styling, just inventive music. Plus, the lead singer's name is Cove. Thats a baller ass name. Not annoyingly different like Apple or Pilot Inspektor, just baller different. And listen to that note he hits in the chorus, just insane. Anyways, this song rocks my face and the lyrics are pretty good thinking material. Draw your own conclusions.
"Its so simple to be afraid, Its so simple when you know who you are..."
JW
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